I guess maybe? I'm not used to it still. I'm better than others? Maybe, but it doesn't make me feel better. I judge by myself. I judge myself too. Very harshly, but that's me. Doesn't make me feel any better. But who would we be if we only lived to be happy? Not much.

You know this is one of the reasons I don't want to go to year 3, when class is split. With people leaving, I fear my memory will be wiped just like that. And then, all my past, destroyed? Can I bear it? Maybe...

The worst kind of suffering in the world is suffering on your own. Double-edged sword.

If I sound like I'm crazy, you're not reading closely. Or maybe I've hidden it too much. Hmm I don't know what I want. Or what I wanted. And now that I've thought,